The Courage of D/s

A definition of Courage that I love.

Why is D/s courageous?

D/s is the courage to show Eros, desire, depravity, lust, care, freedom, desire to be kept, to keep, desire to be in tender or sadistic bondage or place a beloved there, desire to own, be owned, claim, be claimed, madly, erotically, furiously...

Courage to go against what we were told to do, not do, how to behave.
Courage to tell the required truth. And listen to someone's truth in agreement or cool disdain.

It demands vulnerability, maybe some pain, but a promise of pleasure. And then a few more degrees of pain.

Saying it all.
Feeling it all.
And it's not always equal.
It rarely is.

Courage to reveal one's primitive, need, neediness, passion, possessiveness or to be possessed, jealously, madness, need for ownership, power, control, shame, proclivities, tendencies, fears, feelings, what makes me ready to cum, and you too.

Where others go on hiding or pretending, we bask. Use and burn courage up as fuel. Or we use D/s as just another shallow place to hide.

D/s goes deep for me.

You are mine and never mine.
I have you for a moment and we choose to be here, or we don't.

And just like all relationships, D/s dynamics end too.

And it hurts like fuck. Or it doesn't for some, but I would suspect they were never truly there if it doesn't hurt like fuck.

I wish it to hurt like fuck.

D/s gives me something unmatched, and destroys something in me too.

It says, love me and let me love you... but from this particularly special place, unique space, not like the rest... view.

Cherish the view, then give it up.

A private chamber where we speak OUR language.
And it's never the same language as before.
And it's always different from the last.
And it's special here and unique to us.
And you get me here. Me. ME. And I get YOU.

And I give you what so few even want.
But I long to give it, and how pleased I am to find out that you need it.

Finally.
Finally all of this finds a perfect place inside of you.
And in me too.

Your courageous participation in it is also what you get out of it.

My soul is here and when D/s ends... I'm certain a part of my soul goes missing for a while.

I weep, uncertain where to even begin to search for it.

Solitude.
Longing.
Irreplaceable.

And I promise myself I won't let it go as deep next time... but I lie.

And trust-- still after all this time feels so foreign to me, so I honor the moments I felt it and trust in the emptiness too.

And marvel at how I've been trusted to do these things to you, for you, for me.

All the wild chaos and marvelous broken refuge in me channeled into a perfect gift just for you. And you right back into me too.

And I grieve a last kiss unkissed.

So much courage it would have taken to show up to one last kiss to say

We dissolve, we end now, and my fucking GOD thank you.

Let's lick tears, laughter, woes, whoas in what we just had, what we may miss, and celebrate in our newfound freedoms, or maybe this feels nothing like freedom.

And thank you
for meeting me HERE and what a pristine mess we just made.

Now go clean up each side, but separately.

And thank you
And for letting me love from this seedy, filthy, despicable, perfectly gleaming place in me...

What a paradox power can be. How your gift of power can render me powerless and how powerfully vulnerable my power over you must critically need to be.

xx